The shared interest should be, Do we want the same things out of life? Fellas, if you're in your 50s, single and dating (and feeling like you're not getting anywhere), consider this a little friendly feedback from the ladies.

single women for dating-24

Women gave me 300 reasons they wouldn't go on a second date with a guy, and men gave 3.

When guys are ready for that stage of life, they find someone who is good enough that they're totally in love with—but that person may not seem to the outside world to be as appealing in superficial ways—maybe she's not as accomplished or funny as the last girl. Guys don't sit and micro-analyze a woman the way a woman would with a man.

A., with the entertainment business and Wall Street…you get a lot of maximizers' [people who keep looking over their shoulder for something better]. They will be just as picky in a bad and unhealthy way.

The men who are actually available and wanting commitment and who are smart and funny and cute—maybe one guy is a little bit shorter, so he's not getting the women.

And women, lest you think you're off the hook, you're not.

Even though I'm talking to the guys here, many of these points apply to you too. Dating in midlife isn't always easy, but at least you're all in it together, and you can all make it great.

So men, before you break out into a cold sweat, know that all this is well intended and researched. Since I got married for the first time at 51, I can speak from experience when it comes to dating men in their 50s.

I've gathered input from three of my most trusted single girlfriends whose ages range from early 40s to late-50s. We love you guys and want the best for you, so here goes.

Even if you're fresh out of a miserable marriage and new to the singles scene, take a breath.

You can be romantic and take the lead, but exercise patience.

Maybe you've heard it all before, maybe it doesn't apply to you, maybe you've got the dating thing down -- it doesn't matter.