If they're already deep into a topic, don't interrupt it with something else. A few drinks can really help liberate you to say things you otherwise might not say.

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Maybe you’ve been dating or married for several years…

Or maybe you’re just a fan of soul-shaking depth that heals you to the core…

As a published Penguin author, Vanessa regularly speaks and appears in the media to talk about her research.

But too many short cuts can lead to a lazy, unintentional relationship that merely exists, instead of thrives.

Below we'll discuss possible questions you can ask, when to bring them up, and when to avoid them.__The goal of these questions for couples is to have fun in each other's presence and learn something that will help you be a better girlfriend or wife, and help your partner be better, too.

That said, bring them up when there's a lull in the conversation or you're bored; you have nothing better to do than talk anyway, right?

Questions for couples can be perfect over a few drinks at a restaurant or when you share a bottle of wine, but not when you're really sloshed.

It's totally fine to come up with your own questions, but here are a few to get you started.

Throw a few questions into the mix and see what happens.